Thursday, March 26, 2009

"I Promise To Be A Good Kid."

"The best part of life is always the beginning. The worst part is always the end." - Mark Twain

Grandpa passed away on Tuesday morning at 2.00 a.m.

On that weekend I came there, he was in ICU. His condition deteriorated to semi-conscious state. He couldn't talk since there are breathing tubes attached into his mouth. No chance of recovery given of his old age and the knowledge that he could go off anytime. When the doctors took off the breathing machine and moved him back to normal ward, we thought he could last for another 24 hours. We are surprised that he held on for more than 72 hours before he went off peacefully.

It started with pneumonia then after I left, it went bad and the sample taken revealed that there was an E-coli virus strain. The complication is the HUS syndrome which spread to the digestive system to his leg (his right leg was blackened due to gangrene and blood clot). Heart was enlarged due to breathing difficulties. In the last few days, heart beat was like as if he's on a marathon.

The last two days, it was raining heavily. In the morning hours after his passing, it was raining heavily. And yesterday evening, when I went for the wake, it was raining heavily while driving on the highway to Penang (held there for convenience since he's hospitalized at a specialist hospital there.) I see that as a metaphor that even Heaven weeps for him.

I was surprised to see an obituary page of him in the Star yesterday. But I understood that the idea to reach to his friends that has lost contact with him since his retirement 30 years ago. So Tuesday and Wednesday was the wake and just now was the funeral, finished 3 hours ago.

Of the eight grandchildren he had, the one where he has the most affection was me, being the fifth. When I learned that his time could go up instead of three more years as I see it, as well as his condition getting weaker, I wept because I felt sorry for him and his given state.

In the space of four years, I lost all my grandparents.

And when I met him, he could see me in the eyes but could not talk.

I told him that whatever I wanted to say even asking him how would I want to talk to him when he is gone. I would want to hear his answer. There were two main things I told him.

1. I asked for his forgiveness for whatever misdeeds I did to him. He shook his head and he meant that "it doesn't matter".

The weekend while he was awake, he told me that it's up to fate to decide. Maybe he knew it coming, but he was worried that there are many things unfinished that he wishes to clear up before he became unable to talk.

I told him not to worry, go in peace, see the light and meet grandma at heaven. Before he went to ICU, he asked my father and aunts about me and Kevin. He made (his two daughters) my aunts promised him to help both of us out given we're far off from our parents.

2. The second thing I said was a promise to make him less worried.

"I promise to be a good kid."

I remembered of listening to one song by Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald which fits of how grandpa is now finally together with grandma.

Heaven, I'm in heaven
and my heart beats so that I can hardly speak
And I seem to find the happiness I seek
When we're out together dancing cheek to cheek

Oh, heaven, I'm in heaven
and the cares that hung around me through the week
Seem to vanish like a gambler's lucky streak
When we're out together dancing cheek to cheek

Oh, I love to go out fishing
in an ocean or a creek
But it wouldn't thrill me half as much as
dancing cheek to cheek

Oh, I love to climb a mountain
and reach the highest peak
But it wouldn't thrill me half as much as
dancing cheek to cheek

Won't you come and dance with me
I want my arms about you
The charms about you
will carry me through
To heaven, I'm in heaven
The cares that hung around me through the week
Seem to vanish like a gambler's lucky streak
When we're out together dancing cheek to cheek
Oh, won't you come and dance with me
I want my arms about you
The charms about you
will carry me through
To heaven, I'm in heaven
The cares that hung around me through the week
seem to vanish like a gambler's lucky streak
Oh, when we're out together
out together
When we're out together
dancing cheek to cheek

1 comment:

  1. Hey melvin. sorry about your grandfather. i send my condolences and may he rest in peace. He has my prayers. you be good too ok.

    ReplyDelete

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